Kiss and tell: if John Terry wants to redeem himself in the public's eyes, he should claim sex addiction like Russell Brand, David Duchovny and Michael Douglas

It's not looking so great for John Terry. There's the fact that he slept with (and allegedly impregnated) his teammate's girlfriend, but then there are also at least 11 other women with whom he has been linked, while engaged to his now-wife, Toni Poole. And it's early days yet – no doubt several more will have come out of the woodwork this weekend. If Terry wants to redeem himself in the public's eyes, even a little bit, he should claim sex addiction. While he's not going to bounce back from this scandal anytime soon, if he were to put his hand up and say he had a disease, the issue would move from being a moral one into the realms of medicine. Unfaithful, self-serving, impulsive and clearly unfit to lead the English team? No, he was merely in the grip of an illness and it has nothing to do with him using his power, money and fame to have sex with myriad glamour models with names like Shalimar Wimble.


There's no question that 'sex addiction' is the psychological buzz phrase de jour, or that serial philandering is not going to win you a lot of fans, but sceptics are doubtful it actually exists. Can you really have too much sex? Unlike alcohol or drugs, there are no government parameters to guide us. Can it really be classified as an addiction proper as opposed to a psychological disorder? The other most recent high-profile cheater, Tiger Woods, is said to be almost finished a six-week course for sex addicts in a clinic in Mississippi. Pine Grove is run by Dr Patrick Carnes, a leading sex-addiction expert in the States, who believes that up to 6% of the US population suffers from it and whose programme includes measures such as shame-reduction sessions, psychiatric consultation and the requirement for patients to vow to remain celibate for the duration of the course. Woods is merely another addition to a list of famous men who have admitted sex addiction, including Russell Brand, David Duchovny, Michael Douglas and Halle Berry's former husband Eric Benet.


Pat Grange of the Marriage and Relationship Counselling Services (MRSC), which specialises in sex addiction, says that while people like to find a label for things, if it's problematic, it doesn't matter what you call it. "It's the impact it has on the people in a situation so it doesn't matter if it's an 'addiction' or not. If it's causing trouble in a relationship, if it's costing money or if you're putting yourself at financial, physical or blackmail risk, it's a problem."


Grange estimates that sex addiction makes up 8% of the issues discussed by couples who come to MRSC, although it is a problem that's difficult to identify. Whereas drug and alcohol abuse often have obvious signs, the same cannot be said of someone who is using porn as a way of getting their kicks or dealing with stress. "There is no evidence," he says. "Sometimes it might show up as a lack of interest in the bedroom with a partner but very often it won't. They'll still be carrying on an ordinary relationship with their partner while viewing pornography."


Declan Fitzpatrick, a counsellor with the Centre for Sexual Addiction (www.csa-addictions.ie), says that while the centre doesn't keep any official statistics, it is seeing more people year on year presenting wit the issue.


The majority are men, he says, but this could be due to the extra stigma that women often feel about addiction in general and sex addition in particular. "The term 'sex addiction' can actually be misleading as it suggests that sex addicts just like to have lots of sex," Fitzpatrick says. "Any human activity that is mood altering is capable of becoming addictive." He points out that any form of compulsive sexual behaviour – such as masturbation, use of pornography/prostitutes, serial affairs or fantasies – can be considered under the heading of 'sex addiction'.


According to Dr Patrick Carnes, there are 10 possible warning signs of sex addiction, including a feeling that your behaviour is out if control; being aware that there may be severe consequences if you continue and persistently pursuing high-risk/destructive activities.


In any case, you can blame it all on the net. Both counsellors Grange and Fitzpatrick agree that the rise in people seeking help for sex addiction is attributable to the internet. "It's not to say it [sex addiction] was never there before but the internet has provided ease of access. You can go onto chat lines and speak to people without leaving your room and it's not a 'real' person that you're having an affair with. Very often, this is how people see it."


As to whether sex addiction will gain some credibility as a recognised disorder, it's debateable. "The history of addiction suggests that whatever the addiction is, it goes through a phase of initially being dismissed or not being taken serious," Fitzpatrick says. "Addiction to alcohol and drugs is now generally accepted as a serious problem and illness. But of course it was not always so and sex addiction, particularly in Ireland, is now going through this phase. More and more people are becoming aware of it and it is increasingly being taken seriously, but of course people will always have their own prejudices and there is nothing like sex to bring them out."


Are you a sex addict?


1. Do you keep secrets about your sexual behaviour or romantic fantasies from your partner? Do you lead a double life?


2. Have you had sex in places or with people you wouldn't normally go for?


3. Does your desire for sex or sexual fantasies conflict with your religion or morals?


4. Do you engage in risky sexual activities that involve the threat of violence/ stds or 'surprise' sex?


5. Has your sex life ever left you feeling hopeless, alienated and depressed?


6. Does your preoccupation with sexual fantasies take over other areas of your life, such as your finances, your work social and home life?


7. Do you avoid having a loving sexual relationship with a partner?


If you answered 'Yes' to more than one of these questions you should seek help